From the time I first knew I was pregnant I wanted to
give birth at home if I could. A hospital environment
just didn’t sound attractive and my research in to home
births showed that it was at least as safe as a hospital
birth. I also didn’t really understand the idea of
routinely ‘planning’ for epidurals and pain relief –
giving birth just seemed like something my body should
be able to do, and planning for pain relief felt like a
bit of a cop-out and admitting defeat in advance.
We live in a small town so my only options were home, or
hospital. No birth centre, and the maternity unit at the
hospital only had one birthing suite with a pool – a
waterbirth was something else I was really keen on. The
only reason I could see that I might not be able to stay
at home was my age – I was 35 and would be 36 when I
gave birth.
I found an independent midwife who supported home births
and talked to her about my options. She had no problem
with me aiming for a home birth – saying that I was
healthy, fit, and had no reason to expect problems in
pregnancy or birth. Our approach was that I would stay
at home if possible, but would transfer to hospital if
anything was of concern at any stage – we were less than
2km from the hospital.
I got to my 39th week, and then my 40th. I had two due
dates – one calculated on my LMP (3/9), and one from the
20 week scan (13/9). By the 13th, my midwife and I
decided it was time to have an obstetrician check up to
make sure everything was ok. Just a formality I thought.
The outcome - concern that amniotic fluid levels were
low, and that on the morning of 16/9 I would come in to
hospital and be induced. My request to wait just one
more day until the 17th – two weeks after ‘my’ due date
– were declined as that was a Friday and they didn’t
want to possibly have to call in specialists on the
weekend!
This was the last thing I wanted, knowing that my
chances of having a birth free of medication and
intervention would be pretty low. Luckily on the evening
of 15/9 I started to feel tightenings low down. Idly
timing them while watching a movie, I saw they were
quite far apart but very regular – 11 minutes – which
made me hope that this was it and I wouldn’t need to
make the trip to hospital in the morning.
Over the next few hours they continued, not very close
together but still regular. Not painful, just
uncomfortable. I sent a text to my midwife; ‘I think
labour has started, I know you’ll just tell me to try
and get some sleep so that’s what I’m off to do, will
update you in the morning’.
The sensation got more and more like period pains, and
closer together, till at around 3am with the pains 5-7
minutes apart lasting 45 to 60 seconds I gave up trying
to sleep and starting wandering the house. Lying down
was quite uncomfortable – walking around and then
leaning against a wall or bench, swinging my hips,
during each contraction was least uncomfortable.
Sometimes there would be a bit of a break and I’d
actually fall asleep sitting on the sofa, but this
wasn’t often enough for my liking! I never felt any pain
higher up – it was all very low down.
By around 7am I knew my midwife would be in the process
of getting her kids ready to bring them in to school, so
had a quick chat with her on the phone and she said
she’d come in afterwards to visit and do an internal. We
all thought it would be some time yet, but were very
happy to be able to tell the hospital that I wouldn’t be
coming in that day.
My midwife arrived around 9.00am, and told me that I’d
better get the birthing pool filled up pretty quickly if
I wanted to use it, because I was already 8cm! This was
fantastic news as I didn’t think it had been that bad so
far, and to know that I’d already gotten so far was very
very encouraging. I’d been holding off on the pool,
knowing that it could slow things down if I got in too
early! If only I’d known.
Luckily we had borrowed an instant gas water heater, so
the pool was full quickly, and I got in at about 10am.
Bliss. The warm water, weightlessness and being able to
move around on hands and knees so easily was wonderful.
My midwife had gone to report to the hospital and run a
few errands, and I spent the next couple of hours
leaning my head against the side through contractions,
with my partner beside me outside the pool, and in
between running for snacks, or drinks, or whatever else
I decided I needed! Closing my eyes during the
contractions really helped me to focus on feeling them,
and thinking of the pain as helpful and positive, rather
than something to be suffered through. All this time, my
contractions were still between 5 to 7 minutes apart.
By around 11.20, the sensations were definitely
changing, and I was starting to feel strong pressure as
well as the contractions. Each contraction was becoming
more all-consuming – more like a strong spasm than just
cramping and pain. I was about to suggest that if my
midwife didn’t come back soon, we’d better find her –
when she walked in the door, with her backup midwife
following shortly behind her.
A check showed I was fully dilated, but that my waters
still hadn’t broken. A few contractions later and as the
urge to push became overwhelming, they burst with a
rush. I guess I spent about the next 40 minutes pushing
– it didn’t feel painful, just hard work and I could
feel my baby’s head moving down slowly each time. My
midwife was fantastic – I was getting frustrated with
how long I felt it was taking, and she reassured me that
this was a good way to be! Between each pushing
contraction, she checked the baby’s heartrate and that
was pretty much all her intervention. Eventually I could
feel her head very low down, and then the only moment of
real pain that I remember – my tailbone being pushed out
by her head. Then she was crowning, and I felt a lot of
pressure but not really pain, and after one final big
push her head was out. I felt her shoulders as she
twisted round, and she was born at 12.20 on 16/9. The
weather had been awful all day, with thunder and
lightning and lots of rain – and just as she was born we
had a brief powercut, so her arrival obviously made an
impression on the world!
My midwife caught her underwater and passed her back
through my legs and up to me, so I could bring her up
out of the water. I moved to lean back against the side
and held her up so my partner could see, and she opened
her eyes and quietly had a look around – she never
cried, just stared. Her apgar was perfect (8 and then
10), and after about 20 minutes in the warm water we got
out of the pool for the afterbirth and to clean and dry
off. The only damage was one small graze.
After about 40 minutes the cord was still pulsing, so we
decided to cut it anyway and my midwife gave me a bit of
‘help’ to get the placenta moving, which came out
shortly afterwards. I felt a bit ‘tender’ but the
placenta is so yielding, it wasn’t painful.
Some leftovers from last night’s dinner, a sweet strong
hot chocolate, and a bit of a feed for babyM, and then
she had a sleepy cuddle with her dad while I had a
lovely long hot shower. It felt great to be at home with
our new family.
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