Corban's Story
I discovered I was pregnant at
Christmas 2005. Being only 23, single and unsure what I was doing in life, a
baby was a totally unexpected surprise. I am a firm believer in the fact that
everything happens for a reason and never contemplated having an abortion.
When I was 4 months, I moved into a new house in Birkdale with
Dan, the Father of the baby in a situation most would describe as unusual -
needless to say we are no longer together, and probably shouldn’t have gotten
together at all. More a situation that I needed support and chose the worst
person thinking he would give it.
But anyway… my pregnancy was great. No morning sickness, I was
totally positive about the whole experience, and had a great midwife - Creaghan
Mitchell from Albany Midwives Collective. I hadn’t thought about the birth being
anywhere in particular, I didn’t know anyone who had had a home birth, but when
I started going to antenatal classes my views on everything changed. They were
run by the North Shore Hospital and instead of it being a positive experience -
which I instinctively thought child birth was - it was angled so negatively that
I lasted 2 classes and never went back. We were told outright no one having a
first baby could have it at home, this was simply "too dangerous." Birth was a
painful experience in which too much could go wrong to "risk your baby" anywhere
but hospital. We visited the maternity wards, which I found barren, sterile and
a horrible place to bring someone into the world. Hospital is where you go when
you are sick, and babies aren’t sick. The attitude of the other mothers shocked
me as well, some already convincing themselves caesarean was the only option at
avoid the horror, and to be pumped full of as much drugs as possible.
I went straight home and investigated the other options,
coming across this website and several books, such as ’Home Birth Bound’ by
Maggie Banks, and that convinced me what I was doing was natural, and to trust
my body - not a hourde of strange doctors placing a time limit on how long I
should have to do something a man never even can. I spoke with Creaghan
for the first time about home birth at 32 weeks. I had already made my mind up.
I wrote a birth plan she described as a bit staunch, but there was no way I was
going to hospital. I knew I didn’t need to.
I was due Tuesday the 22nd August, and woke up that morning to
what I thought might have been my show coming away. Wasn’t sure, and luckily had
a midwife appointment that morning anyhow. Creaghan did an internal to see how
things were, baby was descending well and she told me he would be born by Friday
at the latest depending on how things progressed. I was excited! I went
shopping, went to my Grandmas house for lunch, and then headed home to rest in
case things happened that night.
By 4pm I was sure something was happening. Beginning to get a
weird feeling in my stomach like period pain was coming, but I didn’t want to
get excited about it, so told myself it wasn’t happening. Called Emma, my labour
partner at 5pm and she came over at 5.30 with Robbie (who is Dans other son.)
Called Dan at about 5.45 who was still at work, but thinking as it was a first
baby that things wouldn’t happen too fast, didn’t get him to race home. When he
still wasn’t home by 6.30, told him perhaps to get here a bit quicker. The
contractions were about 30 seconds long and coming every 7-10 minutes .
Had a bath at 8.30 which was nice, and from 9pm everything was
pretty full on. We didn’t know when to call the midwife, had been in contact
with her via text message but she was happy with how things were going to told
us to wait to call her as late as possible. Emma said we would call her
when my waters broke, as they still hadn’t, but by 10pm I was feeling pressure
on my back passage and told her to make the call. The contractions were
coming so fast I don’t remember much about the next hour, it was about 10.30ish
when we called Creaghan but she too didn’t rush over, thinking first baby, hours
to go.
Emma was awesome, I was just leaning on her on my knees, as
she sat on the couch, and I was steadying my breathing by focusing on the
curtain pattern. Dan was not much help, and left the room to play computer games
after I snapped at him that he wasn’t helping. (What a catch…) Creaghan arrived
at 11.30, when my body starting wanting to desperately push. She told me to
wait, as she set up her stuff and I moved onto my hands and knees. I had a
massive contraction, pushed and as she began to examine me for the first time,
could see the babies head - I was crowning, 10cm dilated and good to go. She
said it was ok to push, so I did and out popped a head. Dan was called and
walked into the lounge to see a babies head. On the next contraction, his body
slithered out, with just enough time to put a drop-cloth underneath me. His
birth sack was unbroken, so if Emma and I had waited for the waters to go before
calling the midwife, she wouldn’t have made it at all!
I stared down at this little person on the floor and I think I
said something along the lines of, Wow, is that my baby? He looks like an alien.
And thus Corban James was born, Tuesday 22nd August, 2006 at 11.40pm. The
placenta came away 2 minutes later, no tearing, no stitches. The second midwife
arrived five minutes after he was born, declaring it the easiest birth she had
been to.
Thinking back, it was so fast, I get excited all over again
when I think about it. I wish we taped it! It couldn’t have happened easier if
we tried. I was so glad I had Corban at home, he turns one in a month, I cant
believe how fast time has gone. I am also 8 weeks pregnant with my second, (to
John, my fiance, the man I adore and who respects me in ways Dan couldn’t
imagine) I wouldn’t even contemplate having the new baby anywhere but home. John
is a first time dad and very nervous, but having the great experience with
Corban has given me the most resounding evidence that hospital births are not
for me - I just wish other mums, doctors and midwives were as open to a more
natural form of childbirth rather than believing all the scare tactics used upon
society when it comes to having a baby.
Investigate all the options, trust yourself, your body and
your baby and don’t let anyone scare you into having a birth dictated by rules
and regulations if that’s not what you want. I suppose I’m thankful at the end
of the day for being positive, opinionated and independent, couldn’t have done
it without that!
Oscar's Story
Getting pregnant again was far easier than we imagined, and again, an easy
pregnancy, no morning sickness or anything dramatic. After the easy birth of
Corban, and seeing what a great little guy he was I was in a good head space and
intended to stay that way! This time around my midwife was Kerry Martin from The
Midwives in Green Bay, who was lovely and we got along great. The only
difference between this pregnancy and the last was caring for a toddler made me
exhausted! Not to mention I was bigger than last time around.
We had a scan at 20 weeks, curiosity more than anything, and found out we were
having another boy. This was great, John is from a family where boys are well
outnumbered by the girls, and it would also be a first grandson for his parents
(having 2 grand-daughters already!) By 6 months I was napping whenever Corban
did, and by 7 months I hardly left the couch! I had no fear that this baby would
be a gigantic monster, I knew he would be bigger than Corban though, who was
3.6kg. My only worry throughout the pregnancy was tearing and needing stitches,
if only because I might have to go to hospital to have them.
Since this was Johns first child, and my second, we watched the pregnancies of
family with great interest - me hoping that it would make him less nervous.
However, when the two woman due to give birth before me (my sister-in-law, and
Johns sister) both had caesareans, I didn't want John to pre-order an ambulance,
as he had been joking about doing. Luckily for me he trusts my instincts, and
was fine with it.
At 8 months, precisely a month and a day before my due date of 15th March, John
had a minor stroke at work. He was in hospital for 4 days, and told he would be
unable to drive a car for a few months, and never drive heavy machinery again.
Rather annoying considering that is what he does for a job! I was a bit stressed
for a while there, but we had fantastic family support, and it ended up being a
complete god send as John was home in my final month to look after Corban,
something I was now too tired to do!
Corban was born on his due date, which didn't help for trying to predict when
the new baby would arrive. On Wednesday the 12th of March I went to the midwife,
being 39 weeks and 4 days. I was confident, if a bit impatient, she was happy,
but warned me she was not working from Thursday night to Monday morning - so if
I went into labour, I would be having either Abbey or Carly at the birth. I had
met Abbey once, but never even met Carly, though knew she was into acupuncture
and had less on her plate than Abbey. We spoke on the phone just in case, and
she seemed lovely. To be perfectly honest, the midwife was not important, I knew
what I had to do, and the baby was going to arrive regardless of who was there.
Thursday night we went for dinner at my
parents house, I was a lot more relaxed and ambivalent about when the baby was
going to arrive - I was just sick of waddling!
Friday morning - I had a great nights sleep and woke up at 6.15 with a bit of a
twinge in my tummy and the feeling something might happen today. Now here is
where things get fast and crazy: I had light spotting when I went to the toilet,
and woke John up in a relaxed manner, and told him I thought our baby would come
today. He was a bit freaked out, and called his Mum, Lesley, who was coming over
to help out. It was 6..30am. I spoke to Lesley, calm, relaxed and then hopped in
the shower and had a cup of tea. The contractions had started already, very
light and easy to breathe through. I didn't want to wake up the midwife before
7, so called my Dad at ten to to get him to come over and babysit Corban for the
day. By the time we called Carly, just past 7am, I couldn't talk during
contractions. By quarter past 7 I was kneeling over the couch, with my stomach
resting against the seat and John pressing my lower back. I have no idea how
fast the contractions were coming, but there wasn't enough of a gap to count too
high. The phone rang at 7.30, about the same time the pressure moved from
my front to my back, and I knew from Corban's birth that things were happening
really fast, and the little guy was on his way! I felt him start to crown by
about 7.35, and started to lean forwards further, sticking my bum back towards
John who was pushing against my lower back to help with the pain. Bear in mind,
we are in the lounge with nothing around us - no clean towels, nothing even
underneath me. I didn't want to freak John out, so didn't tell him how close the
baby was, hoping like hell the midwife would arrive before he did. We managed to
slip the babies changing mat under my knees as I felt the head come out. John
used all his years of TV birth experience, and told me to push, but I waited for
the next contraction and let him come out on his own - I pushed only once the
whole labour. And then we went into shock. John ran off to get some
towels, and I looked at this gigantic baby on the floor who wasn't breathing and
thought 'What the hell do I do now?' Within two minutes Carly arrived, who gave
him mouth to mouth, and got John to get the oxygen from her car. When she asked
him to call the ambulance, we both must have had a mini heart attack, but she
explained it was simply a precaution. He started breathing within a few minutes
then Lesley arrived, my Dad arrived, an ambulance arrived. It was quite a full
lounge within a short space of time.
And so Oscar Chey Longdon was born, 7.40am, March 14th. 90 minutes of labour, no
tearing! Oscar was not a small baby, he weighed 4kg, and continues to feed like
its going out of fashion, already hitting 5kgs at 5 weeks old. I knew his
birth would be faster than Corban's, but I had imagined 4 hours at the most! It
was a crazy but great experience, John was traumatised for a few weeks after the
event, but how many kids can say their Dads delivered them? It will be a great
story when they are older, but it might have put John off having any more kids!
